Memory lane

If these aren't motivation to do a write up at a Damn The Asshole Boyfriend site, I don't know what would be. Of course, I'm generally wise about what I react to and I always tell you the process as I talk myself out of things. That said, this one year anniversary of breaking up followed on its heels by our two year engagement anniversary (and my 21st wedding anniversary the same day) and, well, I obsess therefore I am.

[image removed]

Smoke much?

[Damn, can't see her wedding rings.]

I finally joined my.space in order to access her account's pictures. This is the stupid picture that was her main image. I know P did the chains and label, as he's the graphic artist type. It's odd to me, because he's not really the possessive, jealous type. Makes for a good joke. A good redneck joke. Where's the beer can?

The caption for the picture said 'to my loving and sweet bride,' (how blase is that for a newlywed? he always called me gorgeous and sexy) to which she added that it was uploaded by her new husband. So, that means he obviously knows about her my.space and the things I knew during our phone call had to have been known by him. When he was incredulous about how much I knew during the call in February, he shouldn't have been. I'd assumed he didn't know about her my.space, but then here he is contributing. He's being the big dummy not monitoring. Man, wouldn't that be a great twist? He doesn't pay enough attention and she cheats on him?

She has not written in my-space since before I found it. Norma thinks perhaps he asked her not to after I confronted him in February for some reason other than my confrontation. She has edited it, though. Her entries are private, only accessible by her, anyway, so there's no need to fear me there. The site doesn't have a counter, so she doesn't know who comes by. (Norma also thinks they are feeding me crap, setting me up, because of what's going on which Shancy's daughter's website, below, but the dates make that impossible. Norma is even more paranoid than I.)

The thing to fear, however, is how I'd misjudged Shancy as a mother and a person. I saw her as vulnerable (greatest fear: being hurt) and loopy in a newlywed, gaga way. Instead, it seems that she's just.like.P.

For the above picture, her daughter saucily provided th only comment, saying that she, "her fucking daughter," took this awesome picture in front of her shower curtain and it was before the daughter partied hardy and puked all over the place, messing up the bathroom that evening. The girl is 16.

The daughter's my.space just came open from being private. One can only wonder her purpose. The girl proudly proclaims and writes about her belief in wh,ite sup.remicy and wh.ite po.wer in terms that are scary and inflammatory.

She also lists her occupation as half time drugger and full time dick examiner. She repeatedly touts sex, drugs, alcohol, and rock and roll as her only passions, well, beyond how superior wh-ites are, that if there is a BET, there should be a WET. Does she not realize how funny and inferior she is?

I figured out that she doesn't live with Shancy, but Shancy must have moved to this tiny town to be with her. Judging by the daughter's HSs listed, Shancy always lives by her, if not with her. Ths HS the daughter attends is the same one as L and they are in the same grade. (I can't figure out the daughter's last name, but I guess she's relatively tight with her father, so she has his surname. Shancy's 23ish yo son, who also carries on about partying and is a band guy, carries her maiden name. Shancy would have been around 21-22yo when she got pregnant with him.)

So, her my-space is open for her mother to read...her mother, who probably bought the libations for alcohol-induced bathroom mess at Thanksgiving. Or purchased by P. Or P's mother. They're peas in a pod with this under aged drinking justified by their own proclivity for the bottle or can.

I had hoped so much that this girl would be a positive and sisterly influence for L, but truth is I think she's even worse. The glaring omission in her writing and friends list is the existence of a step sister, so perhaps that hasn't gelled yet - or maybe she's been through it before and doesn't get too close. The only reference she makes to P is in a comment for one of the pictures below, in which she apologizes for being so difficult when they were starting out. Imagine how difficult she'd be if she learned that someone was cheating on her precious mother.

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Do they both have beer guts?

What an absolutely lovely wedding. Could she be more ill-fitted? Would it have killed him to wear a t-shirt underneath? He looks greasy and not particularly happy. In fact, he's not even looking at her. He's nervous, though, squeezing the living shit out of her hands. He subconsciously did the same to me, just hanging out watching TV. Why is he slouching? He usually stood so tall. Is he confident about this?

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ETA:

Stop the fucking presses ............................. Jesus Fucking Christ on a pogo stick!

Last Spring, I spent probably $300-400 at Marshalls for nicer work clothes for him. That's another thing I'd been pissed about - buying him clothes he cheated on me in. It appears that he also got married in. I know bought him that tie and I'm pretty sure the shirt - while we were both fucking with him.

What kind of message is that? I believe I was at that ceremony in any number of ways. I wonder now if she was the one pushing.

I remember it now because the medium blue is electric and I debated the color. All I can say is that is was cheap and it contained his football team color, so that's his prime reason for wanting it or wearing it when I bought it.

Does he have the good graces to be conflicted at least?

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There was only one comment on the wedding picture and this woman said something to the effect of "WOWWWWW!!!!!!" concerning this turn of events, so I am thinking that it happened so quickly that it wasn't announced anywhere before the fact. Heck, considering he was still professing his love for me a mere six weeks out, well, I guess he had a quick change of heart. Um, right. He's riding a gravy train with a house.

[image removed] Her face is tear-streaked and she's obviously as happy as she is homely.

I guess she's the influence for the mullet, a throw back to her HS crush days; I always clipped his hair short.

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ETA: [image removed

For brite: this is the version I had. This is his mischievous look, me taking a naked picture of him the night we got engaged. His look would vary in cuteness greatly. His smile is as electric as that blue tie. Guess I like them about the same now, too.

[image removed

Us on the cruise three years ago.

[Doing this edit screwed up everybody's comments. Sorry, will try to put back in.]
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I think this must be in her new house she bought a year ago. That's a draw to her, a nice house (in the boondocks, shhhhhhhh I drove out there to see it) and a good job making good money.

I believe there could be an additional draw. What sort of person lets their teenager brag about drugs, alcohol, and use to excess? A parent similar to P? A fellow alcoholic?

See, I am beginning to realize with these two, a lot of what I could say at a Damn The Asshole Boyfriend site would roll right off of her. Why would she care if someone like me broke up with him for his family allowing his 15 yo daughter to drink in public?

But she would care about being cheated on, however.

BTW, I am shopping the engagement ring again to consign it - hoping to do the set and not just the center stone. I am curious what kind she got. Probably bought it herself. Goodness knows, most guys can't afford two wedding sets in barely more than a year.

I turned off the flash to capture the detail. This set is so amazingly gorgeous. And sexy.

I am waiting on more, but I have one online quote (I'd have to send the 1ct diamond in) for $1500-2000, which is actually better than the local place where they offered $1475 on consignment for the diamonds and platinum in two rings. If they only buy the center stone, anybody want a gorgeous and oft complimented Celtic-inspired platinum set for say $600, about 1/3 retail? It'd need a center stone and perhaps center prongs.

I need this purge. It'd be funny for me to buy EEG equipment using the proceeds from P's ring. It's only appropriate. One obsession would lead to another, which should then quash all obsessions.