My, how generous?

I was really nice today. Yeah, yeah, you say.

As J and I went to a new park for an unsuccessful round of fishing, we saw a girl by the road waving a sign, FREE STUFF!

I am not a yard sale type. I spend too much and have no place to put it all, so I don't allow myself to go.

On our way back home, much of the stuff was still there, but the girl and the moving van were gone. I'd been eyeing the pair of pool chairs, the faux metal kind that look fancy, but are incredibly light.

So I stopped. The chairs fit in the car. They need cushions, but I can deal with having some chairs we can leave outside. If they get stolen (as I unfortunately live along a stealing pipeline machine leading to the next neighborhood over), I won't be out anything.

After I got the car configured to hold the chairs, I went back to look at something else I'd seen. Baby stuff. You full and well know how I would ignore all that crap. Jeez, I don't need indoor or outdoor baby swings, much like those cheap vases and orange trash can nearby.

But I saw this:

How cute! J could pull that infant around in the snow. J would have so much fun with it.

So I cleared it with him, then hoisted it in my little car, too. Once home, we thoughtfully cleaned it with Chlorox wipes out in the yard. When ex came to pick up J for the weekend only minutes later, I could see the surprise in his eyes. I explained that it was free and that J would enjoy using it.

And I reveled in the fact that ex would have to store it.

Thirteen DVDs on the half shell

Thirteen DVDs I've watched recently: First I'll say that Spellbound, 2002 is in the hopper. See, my friends, we got our first shipment for my newly upped NetFlix trio of shipments. I'm loving it and it needs to sustain me because our little video store that I loved nearby is now closed. Bummer. But as long as the USPS doesn't go belly up, I'm good. Talk to Her, 2002 - I like foreign flicks; this was so sweet and so strange; the director's commentary was juicily psychological rather than being technical. Valiant, 2005 - A couple minutes of repeat exposure; love that Ewan McGregor sounding all chipper and innocent. The Mummy, 1999 - J and I watched this together; for as chicken as my non-risk-taking son is, he loves a scary movie. Vanilla Sky, 2001 - This movie sucked; Jason Lee was a parody of his cranky self. Mumford, 1999 - The redeeming factor is that Jason Lee is a parody of his skateboarder self; not much else is remotely redeeming, not even Hope Davis. The Secret of Roan Inish, 1993 - As much as I studied Joseph Campbell-y stuff in graduate school, I am still not a big fan of myth - I appreciate it and it's existence, but it just doesn't get me excited. Eulogy, 2004 ... again, not that it's great, but it's easy. Mallrats, 1995 - all I can say is finally. National Treasure, 2004 - I like sharing action adventure with J and this had a good dose of history, too. Memento, 2000 ... again, although it is great and Guy is so easy on the eyes. A Cool, Dry Place, 1998 - I believe I mentioned that, even as a Vince Vaughan fan, this movie left me empty; I am not a Monica Potter fan and I am even less a Joey Lauren Adams fan. The parallel to my own life - the deserting mother comes back to claim the kid and the father fights hard, but relinquishes - well, it hit close to home. Broken Flowers, 2005 - Which fucking one was it? The ending doesn't have to be tidy, but give me something! Around the World in 80 Days, 2004 - Jackie Chan is hilarious. This was J's first exposure and he loved it, too. I wish so much I could share the Shanghai duo with him. Oh yeah, one other I bought - Bonus 14 All or Nothing, 2002 - This sucked, so I think I wanted to forget I saw it. Mike Leigh doesn't script his films and the result is a bunch of British bumbling and mumbling. Alas. Another bonus - now playing, so seen on the big screen ... Wordplay starring (briefly) fellow blogger Orange Tangerine. It's a good indie flick to see in the theaters right now. Links to other Thursday Thirteens

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J's flyer for Boumer

J made this at school today. It is charming.



Imagine our delight when ex called about 15 minutes ago (yes, delight when ex called) to say that someone saw a sign I did for Boomer, my way of spelling it, or Boumer, J's way he refers to his dog in stories at school.

The man who found him lives one street over, but it's a very long block to get there. He was driving along, almost hit Boumer, then got out to talk to him and Boumer hopped right in his truck. Ironically, the guy does Sheltie rescue and was responsible for the other lost Sheltie sign we'd seen in the grocery store.

Boumer is coming home!

J will never want to fly away again... Have you seen Boom Boom?

Lost Dog
6/18 from Apple St

Boomer
2 year old male Sheltie with microchip
555 555 5555
Reward


ETA: Thanks so much for everybody's concern.

We put out 25 color flyers this afternoon. We went to 4 vets' offices nearby, including his own. We posted a couple in the nearest pet stores. We put some in shopping center. A lot went out on the road their street comes off of, then some went in the neighborhood near their house.

Ex is very grateful for me doing this. Boomer's special to me, too, so it's the least I can do.

Funny, as we were out, J commented that he's glad I'm doing this, because he knows his dad would never do it. I guess I've earned me some much needed brownie points. When I told ex J's opinion, he said J's earned himself a future konk on the head. (But J's right!)

More letters

Dear NetFlix,

I have little life right now, but I'm trying hard to carve myself a place. I conscientiously plan for Wednesday night visitations like tonight and the bi-monthly/upcoming long, lonely weekend. Occupying myself at a price I can tolerate involves your service. I truly depend on you to help me make my life better. And to deliver a sweet slice of Jason Lee for my personal enjoyment and viewing pleasure in the privacy of my own home. Please devise a better way for Jason to arrive, not all cracked and shattered. He wasn't happy about it and it was traumatic for me to see him that way.

 

I look forward to receiving Mumford at your earliest convenience. And that better be pretty fucking soon.

 

Most sincerely,

Cricket Cricketson

 

PS - USPS received a similar letter, as I realize you are co-conspirators in the blemishing of the perfect Jason.

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com

Another Thursday, Another Thirteen

Hey kind people! Wrong link. Try today's here.

Round 2: Bear with me as I try to integrate things around here. Thirteen Useless Things about why I hate Yahoo's new tool bar 1. I did not want it. It somehow magically downloaded itself. 2. It takes up room on the screen. 3. It has a bunch of useless crap on it. 4. It has a Yahoo seach. Who the fuck actually uses Yahoo to search? 5. The only thing potentially useful on the whole thing is the mail notification. 6. The mail notification comes up with a number when friggin junk mail goes into bulk. 7. The mail notification is wholly inaccurate. 8. The mail notification will indicate over and over the last three emails I already read, but I'm on to that now. 9. The mail notification will indicate over and over the last one email I already read, but it gets me every time because I think that one is new. 10. Because I always have multiple windows open going to different regular places, the mail notification on all the other windows is always wrong and misleading, too. 11. Because I can forget which open window I used to check the mail, I never know which mail notification icon is right. 12. So I go check Yahoo mail again; the tool bar costs me more time and energy than if I just periodically went to Yahoo to check my mail in the dated, old, traditional way. 13. And the main reason I hate Yahoo's fucking new tool bar: I am just pretty fucking cranky these days. Please work Mister Linky! Links to other Thursday Thirteens:

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here.


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

please

I thank you so much for visiting and commenting, but I must ask something for the first time in almost two years of blogging. I've seen others make similar requests on their blogs concerning the nature of comments, but I never expected to feel so strongly so as to do the same here with readers I sincerely care about.

For perspective, please consider this happening with P as being akin to a miscarriage. Perhaps I knew there were congenital defects, perhaps things weren't perfect or going as planned, perhaps I suspected it was ending, or perhaps I even chose to end it, but it still hurts and I must mourn, question, rage, bargain, cry. I am not happy it's over even if there is heard a collective sigh of relief. It does not feel like the loss was for the best. Rest assured, I am not relaxing either.

Further, I do not wish for another baby. I do not even wish to be pregnant again. I wanted this one to be perfect, to be the right one. I am not ready to even consider a next. There is no next. There is no readiness. I don't want to move on.

I need to examine and maybe validate two and a half years of my life and waning fertility. I should not default that it was all for naught, that it was all troubled. It wasn't. I was quite flip and angry here when referencing him sometimes. I needed the outlet so it didn't spill over to him. Obviously I successfully contained that around him in trying to make things work, because I truly cared for him, loved him, and even felt the desire to nurture him to the point that I thought it would be best psychologically for him if he broke up with me. That takes a lot of heart, but my heart is wounded and bleeding, in need of care. There were many good things about him that I don't think I'd be able to find again. I had never felt such acceptance in all my life.

I thought my grief was more clear in my last post. I said repeatedly that I am floundering and I have been for months, drastically so. I need to go through all the stages of grief and not worry about comments concerning redirection or finding another. I don't want judgments any worse than I can already pin on things myself in my veil of tears.

Please respect that even if you don't understand it, dear readers.

Further evidence is brought to light

[ETA Note: the videos don't come up on Bloglines. Visit Churp, Churp. It's worth it.]

In my continuing multi-media quest, I introduce additional Jason Lee sitings. He dropped out of HS to become a professional skateboarder, which he did for seven years, finally giving it up for the acting gig.

Jason Lee, blond, in Spike Jonze's Video Days (1991)

Incredible lamb chop side burns when he eeks out a tune at the end

Jason Lee, street skateboarder, in Visual Sound

Incredible jazz music he's set to

A Mallrats tribute set to John Williams

Contains humorous nudity and stuff

Jason Lee as Earl

Now I've seen it. He makes me laugh.

Here are more video links.
Fear of birds - see it for Ethan Suplee, too
Stolen Car and One Legged Girl
A Couple at TV Guide: a summary that is good and clarified stuff for me, a Golden Globes interview with Melissa Rivers where she actually shakes his hand (Yikes!), and Jaime Pressley getting the same treatment.

And a Mad TV take of with Jaime Pressley: My Name is Dubya


I feel relatively caught up for now. I am satisfied.

Your name is what?

I have developed a sideline hobby of late. NetFlix is to blame.

I already loved Almost Famous

and, really, who could see beyond the beeeauuuutiful Billy Crud-Who-Leaves-His-Pregnant-Girlfriend, but I am getting a bit anachronistic on that judgment.

And this beaut, well, he was overshadowed, in part because of his crazed character:

and I was Cruddy blind.

(However, be still my heart with these two together!)

With NetFlix as my vehicle, I decided to re/visit some Kevin Smith classics. I had not seen Clerks, but I had seen Dogma in the theater. Now I have seen Clerks (even before Clerks II comes out!) and the other over-the-top edited out final scene where he gets shot, sorry, but I liked the irony. Didn't lend itself for a 2, though.

Then I got Chasing Amy.


If anything, it reinforced that I am not a Joey Lauren Adams fan. I don't like the way her voice hovers around a screech or the way her face purses up or any of the rest of her body language. Yuck. There was one very good thing that caught my eye in that movie, tho:


And it reminded me that I witnessed his explosiveness in Almost Famous.

So I got Mallrats. I agree it is a classic. I love the variable clean-ish-shaven Banky:




I am now a Jason Lee fan.

Enough for me to actually want to see a Tom Cruise movie in order to see him again:


So, what's up with this guy?


I am guessing this is Earl. I don't watch TV, except at P's and I haven't been there since before, um, Xmas. I remember seeing previews, not the show. It got nominated for both Golden Globe and SAG awards this year.

Is the show good? Have you seen it? Does it make Jason Lee, in some existential ethereal way, look good?


He looks way too good to not look good. He has an incredible smile.

Here he is as a throw back to his skateboarding days in which he opts not to flash his incredible smile:


I wish he'd shave. Now I sound like his mother.








As for our future together,

Jason Lee will voice Underdog in Disney's upcoming live-action adaptation of the classic 1960s cartoon.

His previous voice credits include the character "Syndrome" from The Incredibles. He'll appear in this summer's Monster House and has a cameo in Kevin Smith's Clerks 2. He's also set to direct a short film that he wrote which will star Giovanni Ribisi and Beth Riesgraf. [his fiancee]

Which brings us to another reason he's known these days:

Son, Pilot Inspektor Riesgraf-Lee, born to Jason and fiancee Beth Riesgraf. [2003]