I really meant horndog, but just couldn't title a post 'horndog.'
Am I getting modest in my old age?
Had a couple long phone conversations with Ted last night. Got a lot straightened out. We realize where we'd gotten off track. Although he kept wanting to afix blame and I merely wanted to figure out the dynamic, we understood each other and the communication was a good exercise. He was supposed to be studying for the interview/test, and he didn't. He said his ADHD makes him a crunch studier; I'm glad I got over that, as I got much better starting a finishing projects in graduate school. Okay, starting and researching to death, only pulling it together at the last possible moment. But, hey, that was progress.
I learned that he doesn't take meds for sex. He was that way on purpose - a willed half mast - as he is afraid of the ever loving HPV. Great, I said, I am a pariah among pariahs. Life really sucks sometimes. I almost cried, but didn't, but told him I was going to get off the phone and cry. He felt really bad and we talked more; although it is rough, I appreciate his honesty and I've been in this sort of position before.
The first thing that popped in my mind, besides crying, is that 60% of adult males have it, too, but they don't even attempt to know. Are there are blood tests to find out, because he really doesn't know his status? He then asked about the vaccine and why someone like him couldn't get it, although he's big time anti meds, kind of granola like me. As far as I know, he could get the vaccine, right? It's just expensive. I like that he's a problem solver as far as guys might lean that way.
While I'm on it, this vaccine legislation thing is a burning pet peeve for me. Why just vaccinate all the little girls when the ones they'll get it from are the boys? Why are men largely able to get over on the fact that they get/have it just because they do not potentially get cancer from it? Does their asymptomatic state preclude honesty and culpability?
I assure you, I would not have the shit if not for a man.
I want to hate men so much sometimes, but I just can't.