Sunday, September 24, 2006

Coming out the woodwork

Where are they coming from?

A couple nights after the last one, but probably because I was wearing the same rather conservative simple cotton shirt and khaki jacket, it happened again.

I'd begun to buy some scallions. Then I looked at the price, 10 for $10. In shock, I began removing my bundle from the little produce bag to put them back. I was embarrassed, but I ain't spendin' no buck on a lil ol' clump o' onions. I have my principles; I could dig them up from the neighbor's backyard for less than that.

Just then, the produce guy walked up with a merry grin. He asked how I was doing, if there was anything he could help me with. I grumbled that no green onions should cost a buck a clump. He said to look again, it was 10 for $1 and I said no look again, it's 10 for $10. Then he admitted he had no clue how much they should cost. I said they should be two or three clumps for a buck. And even that's too much, because they're just for me and I won't even eat half of them before they go bad.

He laughed and said in traitor-like fashion that I should go to the other grocery store. I laughed and said that as I drove, I debated this one, that one, this one, that one. The deciding factor was that that one is closing and (he said it in unison with me) everything's expired. So I went to this one, knowing it'd cost more.

Chatting more, I learned that this is his second job; he has a respectable day job and owns two homes locally. Wow, a responsible guy! He has a daughter in college who got a four year academic ride; she wants to go to an expensive graduate school and he has the bucks, because he'd saved up for the first time around that wasn't needed. A guy who's a saver!

Then he asked if I had kids and I said I have a nine year old. He was bug-eyed, saying something about me starting young. Then I got bug-eyed and said I was 35 when he was born. After he pushed back in his bug eyes, he asked how old I am and it was a 'do the math' moment when he realized we're the same age.

See, people I really do look young. He said he thought I was 25. And I'm agonna change my sidebar back.

Later, he, too, performed the infamous boyfriend feeler statement with resounding success.

Maybe I'll go to the movies and shop for produce just for jollies.


DD said...

I think it's time to post a picture of the magic khaki jacket. I don't necessarily want to be hit on, but to be mistaken for 25? Oh, hell yeah. Count me in!

Anonymous said...


Cricket said...

Yeah, I think I'll call him Veggie Reggie.

Klynn said...

Oh, the fun I could have with produce innuendo...

But I'll show restraint.

Sounds like you'll definitely have to start eating more fresh fruits and veggies, though.

Kellie said...

I think it's time for me to buy a khaki jacket...

The last time I was mistaken for 25 was when I was 16.

What's up with the stupid price of green onions anyway... They're just onions.

Go Cricket, Go!

Irshlas said...

The Scallion Stallion.... ride, girl, ride!!

And I'm completely jealous seeing as I'm 32 and no one thinks I'm the youngest in the office (mind you almost everyone else has children in their 20s!!!)

Enjoy :-)

Orange said...

I loved this story!

Someone recently assumed that a 21-year-old friend and I were apparently I don't look anywhere near 40! (And he doesn't look older than his age, either, so it's not as if we were mistaken for a pair of 35-year-olds.)