Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Working up the courage

Today will probably be the end of Glen and I. Unusual, he's emailed me three times this week and called twice. Last night, he called after 10pm (i.e., too late), probably to finally get around to inquire about tonight, visitation night.
I have grown to resent him seeming to default that we have a relationship, although I've clearly stated that that's not what I want. He thinks he has some measure of control over my time, as if I were committed. Some snafus on Saturday regarding the timing of my visit there, or rather me daring to reserve some of my time for me to paint with friends, got me a whiny response that put me off.
When I finally went over there, which was in time to do what he wanted, but not in time to have sex beforehand, the day was fine - couple bars, sports on TV, great band. Like I said, he picks good things to do, so it's hard turning that part down. Saturday, he behaved while we were out, except once when he whined that I wasn't watching the same game he was, but that didn't stop me. Other than that, we didn't have a bad time, but the lead in to the day bothered me. I am allowed to paint, gosh darn it.
We got in late and I was tired, so I stayed over, but rejected advances, verbally beforehand and physically during. My PMS had turned the corner and, although not queasy or in extreme pain, I did not feel my best and was not interested, stating the rules well ahead of time. I remember studies from years ago that flowing and/or PMSing women have larger body spaces. Suffice it to say that I made that clear.
After a night of no sleep on an uncomfortable, sloping, full-sized, crowded mattress and his cat driving me crazy, there was barely a word as I left. Although we did hug, he didn't even say goodbye at the door - I thought he was following me to my car, but I just heard the door click behind me, so I figured he'd gotten the message. Maybe the extra emails, which were completely appropriate, interesting factoids relating to stuff we'd discussed, have been testing the waters, but I really thought he got the message Sunday morning. I smiled driving home.
Anyway, it's best I do it before he gets even more relational. If not today, then by the weekend. Then, I hope, no dating for a while. Slap me around if I complain.
(Satisfied more with the length, Ron? We all know that size is everything.)

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Kellie said...

*sigh* Well, I'm sorry to see any man go but, he was bugging me. I like the fact that you smiled on the way home on Sunday... it's very telling.

DD said...

At this point, your only regret would be to stay in the "relationship."

Anonymous said...

Good luck. It does sound like the thing to do.

Ron Southern said...

It's good to have a relationship that's not being forced. But it's bad to not have one for too long. Keep an even keel!

Ron Southern said...

You're supposed to tell me size is everything when you get me in the bedroom! Telling me in public implies that you know some sad-sack fact about the unknowable.

I'm an old cowhand,
From the Rio Grande...

Anonymous said...

Of course you're supposed to paint! What a bunch of puckie. I agree that the smile on the way home is very telling.